Lessons I have learned while being unemployed

     When I was working I used to daydream about what I would do if I ever got fired or laid off. I used to tell myself that I would sit around and drink beer all day and play video games. That I would use the extra time to clean the house top to bottom and that I would do a better job of it than my wife did when she was a stay at home mom. That I would sit around and read the classics and that I would memorize Voltaire and Pablo Neruda and long passages of the bible.

    Here is what I actually have done with my 4 months (and counting) of unemployment. I used to sit around and play video games and drink beer then the beer ran out and since I am unemployed I didn't have any money to buy more and I got annoyed that the kids wouldn't let me play for more than about 5 minutes so I stopped playing video games.

     My wife and I have different strenghts and weaknesses when it comes to cleaning. My wife is good at doing laundry, cleaning the bathroom, and mopping the floors but she is allergic to dust. I dust but I am not good at doing laundry and I always load the dishwasher wrong.

     I find it difficult to read during the day, it's a combination of feeling quilty that I am home and not working and feeling that I should be doing more constructive things like cleaning the kids rooms or mowing the lawn and I can't memorize my shopping list during the day much less Voltaire.

     I have learned why my wife did certain things when she was a stay at home mom and I know that she understands why I did certain things and why I acted in certain ways. I learned how quickly the day can get away from you when you are a stay at home dad. There are days when I want to clean, do laundry, go grocery shopping and cook a great dinner and I get 1 load of laundry done and nothing else.

     Speaking of dinner, I find it really difficult to figure out what's for dinner each night!  Somedays I will go online and find a great recipe to try. I have actually been cooking a lot of German food lately. Half the time though I just make soup and sandwiches because I don't know what to make.

    I used to hate it when my wife would call me and ask me to go to the store and pick up a single item she forgot or she needed to make dinner. I hated being exhausted and just wanting to be home and having to delay going home and waiting in a long line to get 1 thing. I remember the first time I asked my wife to do this and she came home and commented on how now she understood why I hated it so much and she apologized for ever asking me to do it! That was the only time I asked her to do that.

   There used to be many times that I would want to get new work clothes because my old ones were faded or getting old or too big / small and my wife would comment that we didn't have the money for it. My wife is working with a lot of young girls that dress cute and trendy and we have recently scoured thrift stores and discount department stores for clothes for her and she understands now why I wanted to have clothes that were in good condition. I went on an interview last week and I wore a suit that was at least 2 sizes to big and I felt horrible. My wife let me go to the outlet mall over the weekend and buy a new suit. I got a great suit for $84 dollars and we both agree it was money well spent.

     I used to complain that I didn't want to do anything on the weekend because I wanted to rest, I was always exhausted and I just wanted some time to sit and rest mentally and physically. I remember one week that my wife worked a lot of overtime and we had a birthday party or something to do on both Saturday and Sunday and I wanted to go because I was tired of being in the house and my wife just wanted to sit at home and rest.

     I learned a lot and I feel like I am a better person for having gone through this experience. Now I am restless and bored and I am ready to go back to work. I honestly don't care what I do, I have interviewed at all kinds of companies and I don't care if it's a call center, retail, anything but sales (I hate sales people, I'll tell why in another post).

     Thank you for letting me express these feelings. If you have gone through a similiar experience I would love to hear about some lessons you have learned.